Ceri’s Random Posts (#24)

Hola to ma people. Do I have any idea what to write? No. Am I distraught that Zayn left One Direction? Yes. Am I still going to write a blog post? No. Na joking. Or am I…

So. Let’s see what google has to say. Well google was a bit crap. I’ve decided to once again take inspiration from my English lessons. We recently put George Milton on trial for premediated murder. If you’re interested, we found him guilty. I would like to do some sort of trial for somebody else. My idea was to write a transcript of the trial but I may do it differently… First, I should decide who I want to put on trial. Oh you know what, let’s just go for an obvious person, which I know lots about. It’s time to take Edward Cullen to court.


Edward Cullen is being accused of domestic violence.


Er, I don’t know how this works, so let’s hear a little something from the prosecution side.

Prosecutor: We have reason to believe that Edward Cullen physically abused Isabella Cullen. Jacob Black went to the police on Isabella Cullen’s behalf. This indicates that Isabella Cullen was too frightened of Edward Cullen to speak out. As you can see from the pictures (there are pictures of finger shaped bruises on Bella) it is clear that Isabella Cullen has been physically abused as there are bruises in the shape of fingers. On Isabella Cullen’s medical record, it states that Isabella Cullen had a horrific accident, in which she broke several bones. It has been confirmed that Edward Cullen was with her at the time of this incident.

Right. Well I suppose we should hear from the defence side. I am aware that court does not work like this and the statements are nothing like what actual lawyers would say. In my defence, I am a teenage girl not a lawyer.

Defender: Edward Cullen would never hurt his wife Isabella Cullen. There is no history of violence for either Edward Cullen or Isabella Cullen. Looking at Edward’s school reports, I can see he was a straight A student, on his way to Harvard. Why would a role model student ever hit his wife? He has plenty of common sense, which is proven by his reports. In Edward’s statement, he says “I love Bella. I love her with every inch of my soul.” Does that sound like something a violent man would say? I think not. It is clear to me that Edward is very much in love with Isabella Cullen. There is no reason for him to hurt her. If Isabella did not go to the police herself that shows that she is content with her and Edward Cullen’s relationship. If she was not happy she would be the one to go to the police.

I would like to drag this thing on for a bit (maybe one or two more posts) so I’m going to leave it there for now. Don’t worry, there’s plenty more to come next Tuesday.


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